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A Guide for the Best Man

Congratulations! An invitation to be in a wedding party is an honor. However, with this honor comes certain obligations and responsibilities. This page will help you better understand your role as Best Man. The information here is accepted procedure. Use it as a guide. You are the attendant with the most responsibility.

The Best Man

  • Serves as a legal witness.
  • Is available for photographs.
  • Drives couple to the reception, unless other arrangements have been made.
  • Usually does not stand in receiving line but helps bride's family in any way he can.
  • If there is a bridal table, sits at bride's right and makes the first toast to her.
  • Dances with bride immediately after the bridegroom and the fathers.
  • Makes sure that women in the bridal party are not left unattended.
  • Sees that bridal couple gets away from reception. If no limousine, drives them himself.
  • Returns bridegroom's wedding apparel as soon as possible.
  • Remembers to thank those responsible for the wedding and reception.
  • Organizes the bachelor party. Except for the bridegroom, this is normally Dutch treat.
  • Usually consults with ushers about a joint gift for the bridegroom, collects the money, buys the gift and presents it to the bridegroom at the bachelor party or rehearsal dinner. This gift often has the wedding date on it and sometimes the initials or names of the givers. This gift is separate from the individual wedding present given to the couple by each usher and the Best Man.
  • Contacts all ushers (unless there is a head usher) and makes sure they know and follow the drill for the rehearsal and ceremony.
  • Sees that the bridegroom has ushers' presents purchased, wrapped and ready for the bachelor party or rehearsal dinner. If special gloves and ties are used in wedding, reminds bridegroom to provide them.
  • Well in advance of the date, assists the bride's parents in arranging cars and limousines for wedding and reception. Gets ushers and friends to help if needed.
  • Receives instruction on attire from bridegroom. Gets fitted, picks up and pays for and later returns clothes if rented. Reminds ushers to do the same.
  • In accordance with the bride's wishes, sees that the bridegroom orders boutonnieres for the men in the wedding party. In some areas where it is the custom, sees that bridegroom orders bride's bouquet.
  • Attends the rehearsal and the rehearsal dinner. Is first attendant to give a toast.
  • Makes sure bridegroom has his going away clothes packed separately and sees that these get to the reception.
  • Sees that bridegroom's suitcase is packed for honeymoon and keeps get away plans a secret.
  • Takes charge of couple's baggage and transportation for leaving reception.
  • Sees bridegroom is properly dressed and on time for the wedding.
  • Drives bridegroom to wedding. Sees that marriage license is in bridegroom's inside coat pocket.
  • Carries bride's ring for bridegroom in his own pocket and produces it at the proper time.
  • Has officiant's fee from bridegroom in an envelope in his own pocket. Sees that officiant gets it before the ceremony or right after the recessional. Pays anyone else who should receive payment from the bridegroom on that day.
  • Follows instructions received at rehearsal during wedding.
  • Other Responsibilities: